


My Neighbour is Ninja, a novel by Oikawa Tooru

by denimdisaster



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: ?? is that the right wor, M/M, Neighbour AU, anyways oikawa is sneaky, have i ever written smth thats not an au??? lmao, n suspecting, w/e
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-08 16:38:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5505005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/denimdisaster/pseuds/denimdisaster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oikawa was convinced that his new neighbour was a KGB agent.<br/><br/>Or a ninja. Ninja was probably more likely since he hadn't heard any gunshots from their apartment. Yet. But he <em>had</em> heard a lot of suspicious sounds. Like dull thud-sounds of a blunt thing hitting another thing. Oh, and they played weird foreign music that was probably about death or something.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Neighbour is Ninja, a novel by Oikawa Tooru

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Flun :3](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Flun+%3A3).



> yooooooo im done w/ this one, finally  
> im so behind on schedule  
> its 4pm on the 23rd n i have two more fics to finish before going to bed  
> d e a t h
> 
> anyways this one is p messy i think, like all of my fics  
> n probably v out of character I AM SO SORRY
> 
> god jul flun hoppas att du får vad du önskar dig <333  
> fy fan tänk dig om jag hade skrivit det här på svenska lmao usch

Oikawa was convinced that his new neighbour was a KGB agent.  
  
Or a ninja. Ninja was probably more likely since he hadn't heard any gunshots from their apartment. Yet. But he _had_ heard a lot of suspicious sounds. Like dull thud-sounds of a blunt thing hitting another thing. Oh, and they played weird foreign music that was probably about death or something.  
Matsukawa told him that wasn't enough reason for suspicion, but that wasn't all! They had moved in when Oikawa was out, but since then they were _always_ out. Except for the evenings, when they beat up something with that blunt thing. And Oikawa hadn't seen them once, despite his countless efforts of staying up until they left their apartment or hurrying home before they got there.  
  
He had thought about going over with a muffin basket as a welcoming gift or something like that, but honestly, after his fourth attempt, he just had to realize that he wasn't good enough at baking. It wasn't even bad enough to be considered cute, with tiny kitchen fires making it possible to call on the neighbour for help, flour on his cheeks. He just got distracted. It was too late for welcoming gifts after a month anyways.  
  
Perhaps he could sneak down to his door and look through the keyhole for weapons? Nah. Bad idea. What if they had rigged the door with traps? It wouldn't surprise him. Although that would provide him with proof... He shook his head. No way was he risking ruining his face for a person he didn't know. Maybe he should just let it go since no one had been hurt, as far as he knew. But that would be sort of like giving up! He needed to get to them bottom of this person (! Not like that!) to satisfy his curiousity! Oikawa Tooru was not a person who _gave up_.  
  
  
oOoOo  
  
  
He finally met the guy two weeks later.  
  
He had just turned on the washing machine for the few articles of dark clothing he had when someone unfamiliar walked in.  
  
Now that could have just been a friend of someone in the complex, like Daichi, but something told Oikawa that this was the new guy. And his instincts were usually correct. Kasamatsu actually _had_ turned out to be part of the FBI and Kise _had_ been a former model. Sure, Midorima had turned out to not be a time travelling alien scientist, but a surgeon with a horoscope obsession was pretty damn close.  
The guy looked really nice... Kasamatsu was hot as well, but he and Kise had already been dating when they moved in. Midorima was gorgeous too but he was shy and a bit cold and honestly just not Oikawa's type. And Daichi? Nah. Too... Goody-two shoes.  
  
This guy though? He may be a ninja, but damn, he was hot. Really hot. The sweater he was wearing was dark and had full sleeves, but it was _tight_ and showed off all the muscles Oikawa hadn't ralized that a ninja must have. He had a really nice face too... Handsome. His eyes were a nice grey colour and his hair looked strangely soft despite being short and somewhat spiky and Oikawa had the urge to reach out and pet it.  
  
The guy turned to look at him and maybe, maybe Oikawa had been staring for a little too long. Only because he was trying to figure out if he could take him in a fight if it was necessary, honest! With those bulging muscles he probably couldn't unless he ambushed him - waited until he went out of his apartment and then waited for him to come back, or something like that. What if he carried weapons on him though? Oikawa could _not_ win an armed fight, it'd be suicide to even attempt it. The closest he had ever come to wielding a weapon was in Home Ec back in high school.  
  
"Uh, hello?"  
  
He startled. Had he been that obvious with his staring?  
  
"Your clothes are finished..." The guy said and raised an eyebrow in confusion. Did he think Oikawa was weird now? The guy beat up things in his apartment, he had no right to think about Oikawa like that.  
  
"I know that, you meanie!" He blushed and opened the washing machine which yes, was beeping quite a lot. Shit, maybe he shouldn't upset a high-class ninja... Of course, he could _technically_ be a low-class ninja, but with those muscles? No way. Definitely a pro.  
  
"So," Ninja guy said with a chuckle and dear god, was it a ninja thing to be that sexy? Wouldn't that cause unwanted attention? Maybe it was useful in a fight since your opponent would be too busy staring at you to fight? Hmm... He looked at the guy again, trying once more to calculate his strength. He was looking at Oikawa with an expectant expression. Realization dawned on him. He had been saying something, hadn't he, before that stupid chuckle destroyed all of Oikawa's brainpower?  
  
"Sorry, what did you say?" He asked with his most polite smile. The one he reserved for authority and small children.  
  
The guy shook his head in amusement. "I was asking what's got you so distracted, ironically enough."  
  
"You."  
  
Ninja guy had the audacity to _blush_. It looked good on him. Really good. Like, Oikawa would totally like to see it a lot more, preferably after kissing and damn it, he was spacing out again.  
  
"I was wondering whether or not I would die if I had to fight you."  
  
"What? Why would you ever... Is that a thing you do? Going around fighting people...?"  
  
"No!" He protested. "But if humanity's on the line then I'd have to," he said and huffed. "I'm onto you, you bastard."  
  
Ninja guy looked like he wanted to say something more, but Oikawa would not have it. He would not have his mind infected by those evil ninja plans. _Not today, Orochimaru_ , he thought to himself and exited the laundromat place, clothes in his hands and plastic bag forgotten on the floor, _not today_.  
  
  
He hoped he made a dramatic entrance.  
  
  
oOoOo  
  
  
The next time they met was another coincidence.  
  
Oikawa was on his way home from school when he literally collided into the guy - books falling down, making ninja guy spill his coffee over himself, all that stuff. Huh. Seemed like even ninjas went to university, judging by the books he too was carrying. Key word: was. Past tense. Or maybe it was just a facade. Maybe he was on an undercover mission to assassinate someone at that school. He gasped and crossed his arms. Ninja guy looked at him.  
  
"I'm sorry...?" He hesistantly asked. Mhm, he better be.  
  
"You shouldn't be apologizing to me," Oikawa said.  
  
"Sorry, but I don't really follow...?"  
  
Oikawa huffed and bent down to pick up his books. He sure as hell wasn't going to spell it out for him. He blinked. Ninja guys' undercover course was on chemical engineering? That's hard stuff...  
  
"You're Oikawa, right? In apartment 3a?"  
  
Ninja guy knew his name? He narrowed his eyes. "How did you know that?"  
  
The guy laughed and damn it, he had an unfairly nice laugh. "It says so on your door, you know. I'm Iwaizumi, in case you didn't know," he said and held out his hand. Oikawa reluctantly shook it. He had warm skin, although calloused and rough. Probably from sword training or something like that. Still, it was nice. Their hands fit pretty well together. Iwaizumi, huh? Probably a fake name, but still a nice one.  
  
"Well, I guess it's... Nice to meet you, Iwaizumi-san."  
  
  
oOoOo  
  
  
Iwaizumi started showing up _everywhere_.  
  
If Oikawa had thought it was annoying when he never saw him, it was nothing to seeing him all the damn time. Suddenly, Iwaizumi was in the coffee shop Oikawa frequented during the weekends. Suddenly they did laundry at the same time, suddenly they walked a bit together each morning before changing directions to get to their own university. One time Iwaizumi had even showed up at Oikawa's _school_ and told him that his Musics classroom had been hired out to another school so his class had been told to have their lessons here instead.  
  
It was incredibly suspicious. What if _Oikawa_ was his new target? He was too young to die! And really, he hadn't done anything to deserve this. He was always nice to people, even ninjas and aliens, and he hadn't upset anyone as far as he knew. Maybe one of his ex partners were still upset, but wouldn't that be stretching it? It seemed a little far-fetched.  
  
Even so, Oikawa was careful. No more late night parties at the weekends - he needed to be able to judge his surroundings properly. No more keys on the table or walking under ladders.  
Alright so maybe that was unrelated but hey, it couldn't help to get some plus points to his luck, right? After all, he was up against a high-class ninja here.  
  
  
oOoOo  
  
  
"Hey, Oikawa? Do you wanna come inside?"  
  
_What?_ He wasn't sure he heard that correctly. Iwaizumi the ninja asked him to come inside his apartment? Oikawa considered it. On one hand, it would be good to get proof of his ninja-ness, but on the other, if it really was filled with weapons, who knew what could happen to him? Perhaps he'd be killed to remain silent. Kidnapped at the very least. Maybe he should just decline, go home and get something to eat. He didn't have the mental strength to even attempt cooking though... But cup noodles weren't all that bad...  
  
"I was just about to cook dinner and I could make some for you if Fettucine is okay?"  
  
_Damn it_. The bastard knew exactly what to say to reel him in, didn't he?  
  
"I don't even know what that is," he answered honestly. It sounded fancy though.  
  
Iwaizumi laughed. "It's a kind of Italian pasta. I was gonna add salmon and stuff to it."  
  
That did sound nice... Way better than the noodles he was going to have. "But why?" He insisted.  
  
"Because I want to?" Iwaizumi looked confused. "Look at it like neighbourly kindness or something. You don't seem to like me much, and I don't like having people upset with me, so I thought I'd do something nice for you? Besides, I always make too much pasta and it always sucks to throw it away."  
  
Oikawa flushed. Had his suspicion been that obvious...? Poor guy must think that he'd done something wrong. He frowned. But he had! Probably... Ninjas weren't nice people, were they? Unless he was like. A Sakura type of ninja. Sakura was great. And Naruto and Hinata and Sai and Neji too, even if Neji was a little snarky.  
  
"What are you thinking about?" Iwaizumi asked in a soft voice that was unfairly nice to listen to.  
  
"Naruto," he answered earnestly and enjoyed the surprised look on Iwaizumi's face.  
  
"Well, how about you come inside and tell me all about your Naruto theories? I'm all ears."  
  
Oikawa sighed. There was no way he was going to be able to resist that. "Fine, fine."  
  
Iwaizumi smiled at him and it was worth it, really.  
  
  
oOoOo  
  
  
" _Please_ don't tell me you're a SasuSaku/ NaruHina fan." Iwaizumi said and frowned.  
  
Oikawa smirked. "No-pe. InoSaku and NarSas all the way."  
  
"Oh thank god."  
  
He had to admit, Iwaizumi was rather nice company. He was witty and funny even if he also was a little brash and well, angry. Except he wasn't, really, it was just how he acted when he didn't know how to act or what to say. Sort of like with Kasamatsu. And Kasamatsu and Kise made a good couple, didn't they? Which meant that surely, Iwaizumi and him would make a good one as well?  
  
He shook his head. _Bad thoughts_.  
  
The apartment was nice too. It was designed just like his own, but there were _so many things in here_. It was obvious that Iwaizumi tried his best to keep the place neat, but there were just too many things for it to look anything but messy. It felt cozy. It was nice to see parts of Iwaizumi that wasn't ninja things - a drum set, a couple of classic novels like _Pride and Prejudice_ , _The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde_ and _Moby Dick_ , all of which were horribly boring and way too hard to read (Oikawa had tried) and of course, his _amazing_ cooking. Who knew pasta could taste that good? Now he might never be able to revert to cup noodles and it was all Iwaizumi's fault. He may have to eat here every night.  
  
"Hey, Iwaizumi, is this one any good? I've heard lots about it," he said and held up a book from the (gigantic) bookshelf.  
  
Iwaizumi looked up from the dishes that he so kindly offered to take care of after Oikawa broke a plate. "Oh dear," he whispered before clearing his throat. "Well uhm, it's _good_ , I guess, but it's dark as shit. I'm not sure if I recommend it."  
  
Oikawa looked at the backside. "A vampire book, huh? I wouldn't have guessed you were that kind of guy."  
  
"I also heard lots of things about it, Oikawa. I decided to read it. And honestly, I'm glad I didn't watch the movie first. It's gross. Don't read it."  
  
"I watched all seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer by myself. I'm borrowing it," he said proudly.  
  
Iwaizumi sighed. "It's not... Gross in that way. But I don't think I can stop you so sure, go ahead."  
  
Oikawa was forced to abandon his ninja theory though. When Iwaizumi had first shown him inside, he had noticed a couple of training dolls lined up to one wall, and when he asked about it, Iwaizumi had explained that he was a more or less professional kendo-ka. He started laughing when he heard about the ninja theory but really, he wasn't that far off. Kendo and ninja stuff are pretty closely related.  
  
"Iwa-chan, what's your first name?" He asked him later on, when they were sitting on the couch trying to decide on what movie to watch.  
  
"Iwa-chan? What's up with that..."  
  
"You didn't answer the question!"  
  
Iwaizumi smiled that gentle and patient smile of his. "Hajime."  
  
"Iwaizumi Hajime..." Oikawa whispered, tasting the name. What a nice name. Iwaizumi sounded rough and tough, while Hajime sounded so cute and pretty. Which was a rather accurate description of him, wasn't it? "Hajime, Hajime." It was nice to say.  
  
  
And then Iwaizumi Hajime kissed him.  
  
  
His lips were rough but smooth, just like him, and he was warm and it made Oikawa feel all nice and fuzzy and tingly. Ecstatic.  
  
Hajime pulled away way too soon, but Oikawa knew that not everyone could hold their breath for as long as he could. He had a gift with that.  
  
"I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have-"  
  
Hajime stammered and stood up to leave, but Oikawa grabbed his wrist.  
  
"Hey, were you going to leave? From your own apartment?" He laughed. "I don't think so, big guy. Now get back and kiss me again before I hit you."  
  
Hajime snickered. "Do you have a thing for that? Fighting people?"  
  
Oikawa giggled and petted Hajime's muscles in fascination. Really nice muscles, those. He hadn't been wrong about _that_.  
  
  
"Nope," he said. "Only people that I like."  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> im gonna Die  
> also that book is called 'let the right one in' by john ajvide lindqvist n its rly terrible alrite? i read it when i was 12 n just.. no. its wellwritten n so but its rly rly rly sad?? gross?? disturbing  
> look it up on wikipedia (the novel, not the movie)
> 
> im sorry but i literally cant end thngs so the ending is shit
> 
> oh n yes im on inosaku/ sasunarusasu teams heh
> 
> merry christmas to yall


End file.
